Every Single Time Part II

There is a current trend going on that I don't appreciate.

On every major holiday I now get a prank pulled on me. And, based on how the last few pranks have gone, I'm not looking forward to my Christmas surprise.

Anyways, to think back....back to Halloween, Jeremy kindly gave me the option of when I would like to be pranked, but REALLY?!? There was no pass option, but at least I got to choose the day I wanted it, even though I forgot about it. So, I was home alone and getting over a cold as I remember it. I was waiting for Jeremy to get home from the show that he was in at the time and to ease my cold, I was in my kitchen opening a bottle of pomegranate juice to, ya know, get all those antioxidants and stuff. As soon as I was about to open up the juice there was a bang on the window behind me, which threw me off guard since the only way to get to that window is by being on the roof. Also, might I add, we had been recording scary movies off TV so that we would have them edited, so as soon as I heard the bang on the window, I instantly shot into young, innocent, helpless female, victim, mode. My first instinct was to grab something to defend myself with so I ran into the next room, pomegranate juice in hand, ready to defend my home. My next thought was to grab a bat, but we don't have one so I snatched the next best thing- my mop. I ran to all the doors and locked them and turned off the lights as the intruder was banging on the windows of my home. Suddenly, Jeremy called! My savior! I started whispering that there was a crazy man trying to get in and I NEEDED HIM HOME!! He said that the show had just ended and he was walking out to his car and he was totally cool and collected as I sobbed to him that I was going to be dead before he even got home! While having him on the phone, I was turning off more lights and trying to shut all the blinds so the crazy kidnapper on my roof couldn't see me. In the process, I was running from room to room as fast as I could so the intruder couldn't see me, although, I was swinging the mop around my head causing some minor damage. Finally, after what seemed like HOURS of fearing for my life (it was probably more around, like, 5-10 minutes), JEREMY came around and exposed himself as the intruder. After giving him a few whacks with my mop, I finally came around and forgave him.

More recently was the Thanksgiving scare. We were going to be eating dinner with his parents and then going over for pie to my parents house and Jeremy kindly offered to bring his amazingly yummy peanut butter pie. I forget why, but that day he had a few bandages on his fingers and early in the morning while he was cooking he turned to me and said "Huh...have you seen any band-aids laying around? I've lost one." I told him no, and thought nothing of it, THEN right before we were going to go be with his family he says "Look, don't freak out, but I can't find the band-aid and I think it's in the pie for your family but I'm not sure."

A part of my soul died.

You guys don't even understand....MY HUSBAND IS A GOOD ACTOR! He didn't smile, giggle, NOTHING! He looked so concerned and I was crumpling to the floor. He told me that we could take it over and while I was cutting it up, I could look for it and if I saw it in the pie I could snatch it out before anyone saw. I was going to serve a band-aid pie to my family!! He made me swear that under any condition I would not disclose what I knew and I can't believe that I agreed... So, later that night, my mom says that it's time for pie and she was excited to try Jeremy's. I wanted to burst into tears! We start serving the pie and my entire family wanted to try the peanut butter pie even though I was trying to sell them on the other ones. I looked so hard at everyone eating just in case they started to choke or something and everyone seemed to be enjoying it, although, I couldn't eat my piece after what I knew. Everyone finished, no band-aid. I figured it was in the leftover pie that was still upstairs but it became clear that there was no band-aid when Jeremy turned to me with this giant grin and said "Did you enjoy your Thanksgiving prank?" Then I came clean with my fam. I told them everything and the stress that I had endured all day long! After hearing this my mother turned to me and said "You were really going to let us eat that?" Fail.

With Christmas being upon us, I can only imagine what will happen to me or the even bigger question, if the stress building up to it will kill me.

I suppose time will tell.